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Bugs: Recent Topics Paging, Uploading Images & Preview (11 Dec 2020)
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- SuperflyPete
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- Black Barney
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- Cranberries
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We are back from our trip to Portland and the coast. Some thoughts:
1. If something quirky and cool came along after I left in 1996, it is inauthentic and doesn't count. I'm looking at you, Voodoo donuts (2003)
2. The transformation of the Pearl District into a fancy place for fancy people was probably inevitable, and really is more fun than warehouses.
3. Powell's is still pretty great, just because the selection is amazing and all the good stuff is right on the surface, so great curation
4. Quirky and charming can be commodified, but only to a degree. My son told me about a place called "Portland Burger" with fake, safe graffiti in the bathroom and a stage that is never used. A fun thought exercise is to ask yourself which cities are worth visiting if you couldn't purchase anything.
5. We heard Pearl Jam being played at Starbucks (we needed water) and Little Burger, a local chain. It felt ironic, but was probably one of the local, terrible radio stations. Grunge LARPing.
5b. The rose gardens are much more interesting now that I spend more time doing yard work and gardening. I am getting old.
6. There are almost no SUVs or large vehicles on the roads
6b. I left my fancy camera home and used my phone, because the last time we came I left my camera and lenses in a campground bathroom and lost it all. I blame it on sleep deprivation.
7. The numbers of homeless around Old Town and under the freeways was distressing. Perhaps they are more visible because of the tents. My brother-in-law said that there have been people spraying them with artificial hornet attractant, but that sounds like an urban myth. I know that SLC has its own problem, but I live in the Orem bubble.
8. My father-in-law, a widower for 18 years, is marrying his maid-of-honor and moving to Staatsburg, NY. He gave away almost everything. It is sort of like he died, but supervised the distribution of his stuff.
9. People don't acquire physical things that have meaning that they give away, really. My father-in-law's father traveled around the world as a merchant marine, and had some cool, exotic stuff. My son inherited a monogrammed hunting knife that was probably from the Korean war. We have a couple of pre-1914 Indian brass incense burners.
10. Any physical item I acquire at this point will have little to no meaning for my children who have moved out.
11. When I visit my in-laws, I discover that all of my authority is regional, and is immediately stripped away at the Oregon border, and my wife and father-in-law (I have to bankroll you people) make all the decisions. My input is regularly requested and immediately ignored. Essentially, I become the oldest child, which is ok. I also become a big baby.
12. When it rained at Saturday market, all of the tourists ran under the overpass, and all of the locals calmly pulled out their waterproof shells.
13. I saw a surprising number of men in their late 50s, wearing backpacks, and walking around in or through the Burlingame area or on Terwilliger, which is fairly fancy. I think they were just single, employed men, who walk everywhere. Many, many older men were Bradley William Bleck -ing around on carbon fiber codpieces. I did not see as many young people wearing gas station attendant jackets on single speed rebuilt bikes.
14. I saw a number of bearded men in dresses, in transition.
15. My son says that SLC is the next Portland. I'm not sure about that. You have to have a period of depressed income and strong alternative cultural influence, plus really great zoning, to create a Portland.
16. A tiny house across from my Father-in-law's was selling for $420k. Unrelated: we got in the van to leave. Two people (NEW people) were standing in the street, talking, blocking the road. They didn't move as we approached. My father-in-law has lived here for forty years, back when there wasn't any pavement. So much old man rage in me.
17. Many of the homes on his street were converted to rentals when the original owners cashed in
18. If you cut down suburban trees for a living, there is a lot of work in Portland. So much work. When my FIL cut down two encroaching trees, the interior temperature of his non-air-conditioned home went up by four degrees.
19. It took us 90 minutes to exchange an old iPad and purchase a new one for my FIL at the Apple store. My marriage in the temple in Portland 24 years ago, which is supposed to be for time and all eternity, took less time.
There's a strong argument for selling your own old iPad and buying one online if you have the time, which we did not. Our assistant was completely blind, complete with a guide dog, but that probably only added five minutes to the transaction.
20. My perception of Portland, and reality, is almost entirely shaped by whatever chemicals are sloshing through my head due to lack of sleep, food and whatever chronic stress is doing to me. This makes me a completely unreliable narrator.
21. We saw gray whales breaching and spouting at Depoe bay. They were a delightfully jarring counterpoint to almost everything else on the trip, something we couldn't buy or schedule or even fully understand.
22. Now that my father-in-law and free hotel is moving, that may be our last trip to Portland for a while. So many things coming to a close.
22b. Summer is over.
23. My kids noticed the beginning of a bald spot.
24. Christine rolled up my trousers at the beach
25. You know where this is going.
I grow old ... I grow old ...
I shall wear the bottoms of my trousers rolled.
Shall I part my hair behind? Do I dare to eat a peach?
I shall wear white flannel trousers, and walk upon the beach.
I have heard the mermaids singing, each to each.
I do not think that they will sing to me.
I have seen them riding seaward on the waves
Combing the white hair of the waves blown back
When the wind blows the water white and black.
We have lingered in the chambers of the sea
By sea-girls wreathed with seaweed red and brown
Till human voices wake us, and we drown.
--T.S. Eliot
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- Legomancer
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- SuperflyPete
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Cranberries: you became old the moment you referred to your PANTS as trousers.
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- ChristopherMD
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SuperflyTNT wrote: Cranberries: you became British the moment you referred to your PANTS as trousers.
Fixed.
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- Colorcrayons
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ChristopherMD wrote:
SuperflyTNT wrote: Cranberries: you became British the moment you referred to your PANTS as trousers.
Fixed.
Isn't that the same thing?
I heard British babies are born with a Calabash pipe, and their first words are: "By Jove, old bean".
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SuperflyTNT wrote: Oh, one note: the moment I closed it, closed the browser, and came back, it showed “MYSQL ERROR”. I then got a work call from a pleasant man who I could hardly understand, and when I came back 25 minutes or so later, I found that all had been restored to its former glory
Hmmmm. Sounds like an SQL error.
That's all I got. If it doesn't happen again, it was just a blip.
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So it's a SQL database, if you will.
......
I'll show myself out
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