Wrong Star Wars Toys.....

I was wandering around Toys R Us, when I stumbled across the above. Yes...that's a perfect playset. I think all kids should be able to re-enact war crimes. I wonder if this is for the budding Oliver Stone?

Stormtrooper1: I know they're hiding the droids.
Stormtrooper2: We're not sure....
Stormtrooper1: They're just fucking dinks...Let's do the village man....
Leader: We're not doing nothing....
Stormtrooper1: They're hiding the droids...I know it...LET'S DO 'EM....


A little later. Stormtrooper1 is holding his blaster to Beru's head. Lars is looking on.
Stormtrooper1: Tell me where they are....or she gets it...
Lars: I told you.....
Stormtrooper1 smashes her head in....
Stormtrooper1: Woah...Did you see that head come apart....Let's do the village now....

I am stunned by just how wrong that is, and how not-fun to play with that would be for a child anyway. I guess it's only meant for the man-children.

It actually reminds me of that Star Wars spoof of Cops called "TROOPS". Pretty sure there's a scene of the 'domestic disturbance' at Lars Farm where Beru loses it and blows up a thermal detonator, but I can't find the quotes online for that part.



Captain Jyanix Bach: We got a, uh, routine stop here. We have a report of some stolen droids and, uh, we think these might be it.
[dismounts from his Speeder Bike and walks towards a couple of Jawas.]
Captain Jyanix Bach: Excuse me. Excuse me. Uh, do you wanna come over here, please? Yeah, I'm talkin' to you.
[one Jawa approaches Capt. Bach. as the other puts down a small droid.]
Captain Jyanix Bach: Uh, whose droid is this?
[Jawa answers in indistinct language.]
Captain Jyanix Bach: Uh-huh, it's your cousin's. Is this your cousin? Is this your cousin? Are you his cousin?
[the second Jawa replies in his language.]
Captain Jyanix Bach: No? Okay, then who are ya?
[Jawa replies]
Captain Jyanix Bach: Ah, you're his friend. Well, Mr. Friend, would you, uh, step over here for a moment, please?
[turns back to the first Jawa.]
Captain Jyanix Bach: Okay, so the, uh, droid belongs to your cousin. Now, if I go over to that Sandcrawler over there, and ask to see your cousin, is he gonna have a bill of sale for this?
[Jawa tries to answer]
Captain Jyanix Bach: Okay. Well, what I'm gonna do now, sir, is place you under Imperial arrest, so we can only help.
[the second Jawa attempts to approach Capt. Bach, who points his blaster at him]
Captain Jyanix Bach: Hey! Am I talking to you? Am I talking to you?
[Jawa shakes head]
Captain Jyanix Bach: Then stay over there, and shut your mouth. Now if you move again, I'm, uh, gonna shoot ya.
[the first Jawa talks]
Captain Jyanix Bach: No. Yeah, I understand. I got a wife and kids too, but you don't see me out here stealing Imperial droids now, do ya? Yeah, sure, you'll never do it again.
[the second Jawa attempts to run away.]
Trooper HK-888: He's makin' a run for it!
[HK-888 aims and fires, blowing the Jawa's head off. Meanwhile, the first Jawa also makes a run for it]
Trooper HK-883: There goes the other one!
Captain Jyanix Bach: I got him!
[aims and shoots Jawa]
Captain Jyanix Bach: Okie-doke.
[points blaster towards camera]
Captain Jyanix Bach: Uh, shut the camera off. Yeah, shut it off! Shut it off!





You can grab a copy at http://theforce.net/fanfilms/shortfilms/troops/

Mr. Bistro wrote:

I am stunned by just how wrong that is, and how not-fun to play with that would be for a child anyway. I guess it's only meant for the man-children.

I would be tempted to write an e-mail to Hasbro.

When is the "Leia in the interrogation chamber" playset coming out?

I wanna see the Anakin Kills the Younglings set.

Mr. Bistro wrote:

I wanna see the Anakin Kills the Younglings set.

Oh - that is nasty .

Aarontu wrote:

When is the "Leia in the interrogation chamber" playset coming out?

I think they have the Han in the Interrogation chamber set....

What's wrong with it? Shit, when I was a kid I took the netting off my snake mountain playset so that when mekaneck fell down the trap door he would land straight in the pool and get eaten my the tenticle monsters. Stop being such giant pussies.

I dunno, I was more disturbed by the $49.99 price tag on something that used to cost about $10 than anything else.

Michael Barnes wrote:

I dunno, I was more disturbed by the $49.99 price tag on something that used to cost about $10 than anything else.

Yeah - that's what I thought you're beef with it was at first.

Southernman wrote:

Mr. Bistro wrote:

I wanna see the Anakin Kills the Younglings set.

Oh - that is nasty .

Not nasty at all. The younglings even have spring-apart body parts to let you re-live all the action in the movie.

Mr Skeletor wrote:

What's wrong with it? Shit, I still take the netting off my snake mountain playset so that when mekaneck falls down the trap door he lands straight in the pool and get eaten my the tenticle monsters. She-Ra is mine fucker!

Fixed.

Those younglings come apart like Legos in those awesome games.

it's not Star Wars, but check the number one.
www.cracked.com/article_15813_5-most-ill...-action-figures.html

H